小人畏威不畏德 The Villains Fear the Power But Not the Virtue

"Fearing the power but not the virtue" was first recorded in the "Comprehensive Mirror for Aid in Government" Zizhi Tongjian by Sima Guang of the Northern Song Dynasty. It describes what Emperor Taizong Li Shimin of the Tang Dynasty said when evaluating ethnic minorities such as the Turks: "The barbarians are beasts. They fear authority but not the virtue."

After writer Lu Yao became famous, troubles followed one after another. Because his relatives came to him one after another to borrow money. Relatives came to him one after another, borrowing money, or asking him to help arrange jobs. It seemed that Lu Yao was not only rich but also had power that reached the heavens and could do anything. Even worse, some literary vagabonds who were penniless and traveling around the world came to his door, ragged but with a solemn air of defeated arrogance, asking him to provide them with passage money to fulfill their sacred hobbies.

After Ju Zhiwen, the "Overcoat Brother", became famous, he had the same experience. People in the village crowded into his yard to film him to earn money, which affected his daily life. More often, they came to borrow money, and there were also people who came from afar out of admiration. The money lent was wasted, and if you didn't lend them money, they would use all kinds of harsh words and means. This forced the " Overcoat Brother " to constantly hide and avoid.

Ho Hung San said, "When dealing with people from the lower class, you must not be too friendly. The more you show respect in your behavior towards them, the more they will think you are easy to bully. In their perception, your kindness can easily be regarded as being easy to bully. Rich people fear virtue but not authority, poor people fear authority but not virtue. In this society, there is only virtual dignity and real interests. Respect cannot be gained merely by virtue."

People of lower status often have a strong animal nature and like to scratch and trample each other, without following rules. To truly gain the respect of these people, you must maintain a sense of boundaries. The more you are kind, respectful, and polite to them, the more they will think you are weak and vulnerable.

Respecting others is a form of virtue, but not everyone is worthy of your respect. Unbalanced respect is undoubtedly a form of self-deprecation. If others push their demands further, you should reflect on whether you are too weak. After all, the villains in this world are often made by weak people.

Lu Xun once said, "When a brave person is angry, they will challenge a stronger person; but a timid person is angry and will only vent their anger on a weaker person." The strong draw their swords towards a stronger person, while the weak draw their swords towards a weaker person.

If you are kind to someone but that person has a low level of cognition and poor quality, he may regard your kindness as submission and flattery, thus developing an inexplicable sense of superiority, thinking that he is above you. During the interaction, he may hold a grudge against you over some trivial matters. This is because your boundless kindness has triggered the evil in his nature.

Therefore, when dealing with villains and people at the lower level, never think of putting yourself in their shoes and using kindness to influence them, thinking they will only repay you with gratitude. But they only repay kindness with evil.

If you cannot confront them or even fight with them, then maintaining a distance from them is the best strategy.

“畏威而不怀德”最早出自北宋司马光的《资治通鉴》，记载唐太宗李世民评价突厥等少数民族时所言：“夷狄，禽兽也，畏威而不怀德。”

作家路遥成了名人以后，烦恼也接踵而来，因为他的那些亲戚一个个找上门来借钱。亲戚们纷纷上门，不是要钱，就是让他帮忙安排工作，似乎路遥不仅腰缠万贯，而且权力通天，无所不能。更有甚者，一些身无分文而周游列国的文学浪人，衣衫褴褛却带着一脸破败的傲气庄严地庄严地上门来让路遥为他们开路费，以自助他们神圣的嗜好。

大衣哥朱之文成名以后，也是如此的待遇，村子里的人挤在他的院子里拍他的视频来挣钱，影响了他的日常生活。更多的时候是来借钱，还有慕名远道而来的人。借出的钱打了水漂，你若是不借钱给他们，他们便是各种的恶言和手段。逼得大衣哥东躲西藏。

何鸿燊说：“跟底层人打交道，千万不能太友善，你行为上越尊重他们，他们越觉得你好欺负，在他们认知里，你的善良很容易被当成是好欺负。富人畏德不畏威，穷人畏威不畏德，谁厉害就怕谁，这个社会，只有虚拟的尊严和真实的利益，光靠教养是换不来尊重的。”

低层次的人往往动物性很强，喜欢互相撕踩，不讲规则。要想真正获得这些人的尊重，就必须保持边界感。你越是对他们好、尊重他们、有礼貌，他们反而越觉得你软弱可欺。

尊重他人是一种教养，但并非人人都值得你去尊重。失衡的尊重无疑是对自己的贬低。如果他人得寸进尺，你就应该反思，是不是自己太过软弱。毕竟，这个世界的恶人往往是被软弱的人惯出来的。

鲁迅曾说：“勇者愤怒时，会向更强者挑战；而怯者愤怒时，却只会向更弱者发泄。” 强者抽刀向更强者，弱者抽刀向更弱者。

如果你友善地对待一个人，但这个人认知低下、素质差劲，他可能会把你的友善当成屈服和讨好，从而产生莫名的优越感，认为自己高于你。在相处的过程中，他可能会因为一些小事就记恨你，这就是你毫无边界的善良激发了他人性中的恶。

故此，对待小人，对待底层中的人，万不可想着将心比心、能够用仁义来感化他，小人只会恩将仇报。你若不能与之翻脸甚至打斗，那么与他们保持距离，最好远离，才是上策。